Jerry Thomas

United States, Illinois, Lansing
54 years old
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Dating Relationships Independence Women Over 40



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How do you balance your life and be independent in a relationship? For some women it is facing about your greatest fear that you will somehow get lost en route. You can find how to ensure that you do not give about yourself while being in a relationship. Five ways to keep Surefire independent and happy while meeting and find a relationship that is the right balance for you.

Women who want a relationship


According to a recent Loveawake dating site research at least 50% of women over age 40 whom I coach say at some point, rather defensively, "I want to do this coaching work with you, but I'm not sure if I want to be in a relationship." They are defensive because they think that everyone should want to be with a partner. That is how the world appears, especially when one is unique. Interestingly this is not the whole story. When I dig a little deeper what usually occurs is that for many women their worst fear is that they do not want to lose their independence. You all worked hard to earn your place independent, especially those in their 40s, 50s and 60s. This is obviously not only in relationships but also in the world of work. For many women when they have grown accustomed to being unique, they are in many respects, very happy with their lives. "I like being able to do what I want when I want to do without having to ask permission of someone else." Emily said the divorced woman in her 50s. "I spent so many years being at the disposal not only my husband but also my children, they grew up and now it's time for me. " We can all sympathize with her.

Women want independence and relationships


In fact, many women come to me to know is whether they can find the type of relationship they want while maintaining their independence. Like everything in life is about balance. Coaching relationship does not mean that we do not look at the overall picture of your life. No relationship will work if you are not in harmony with yourself. Now, you may have been widely used to "do your own thing", but there remains a niggling doubt. This little voice said: "Why can not I have all that and also having a relationship." Well the answer is that it is possible and I help women achieve this goal. It is especially important that you first be clear what you want to keep your independence and what you want in a relationship.

What should be in place for a relationship at work?


What you need now clear is what elements of your independent living, you want to keep. Think about what are the "must haves". These may be things like time, certain types of space and a certain amount of time to spend with friends and family. You get the idea. Once you are completely sure what it is you start to have a blueprint for the life you want with someone else. Also make a list of what it is you want a relationship. Remember those days, there are all sorts of arrangements - they will not all live in married partnerships.

How to keep the boundaries of your relationship intact


What is most important is that you are aware of your limits in a relationship. Finding the right balance can be difficult, but if you have articulated for yourself your own "must haves", you'll be in a much stronger. This may sound very artificial, but think about it. When you buy a new piece of kitchen equipment, you spent some time thinking about what functions you want to give him. It are100 different types of washing machine out there but if you have your "must haves" clearly listed then it will make the process much easier. I know that sounds like looking for a relationship, c 'is like shopping. Well it is in some way and do not we all love shopping? Remember, it is sure to be the selector, which is one of the ways you maintain your independence and do not get carried away in an instant.

1. Make your "must haves list" for your independent life
2. Make a list of your needs in a partner
3. The remaining selector dating and finding a relationship
4. Stick to your list - share with a friend and ask them to remind you if you start to slide
5. Learn to say "no" at the beginning of the relationship if things do not fall - they will not change simply because you hope they will!

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